I would like to discuss the topic of my last post a bit more, as G got upset about it which led to a more in depth discussion that brought a few things to light.

I think there are several factors at work in my musical disillusionment.

1. I listen to music mostly at work, which is not conducive to paying attention
2. MP3s suck.

1. Most of my time is spent sitting at my desk, and some of that time is spent with my headphones on and iTunes open. There are some days when I can put on my headphones and get lost for hours in a meditative haze of Photoshop and music. But most days, as soon as the headphones go on, the phone rings, or I suddenly get the feeling I'm being watched, and turn around to find everyone staring at me, trying to get my attention for some trifling thing. Once I pause iTunes, chances are I'm going to forget to go back to it, and by the time I remember, I'm not in the mood to listen to that particular album anymore. The bottom line, I need to start listening to more music at home where there's not so many distractions.

2. This sort of leads into #1. MP3s are in some ways the downfall of music. Personally, I'm not into file sharing, because I'm old enough and make enough money that I really don't feel all that great not buying the music that I like. I tend to make exceptions for older and richer and deader people, because the estate of Frank Sinatra doesn't really need my $14, so I think of it a bit as a victimless crime if I download that illegally. Of course, it's that $14 that's also helping out smaller bands on the same record label, so I guess maybe that argument isn't so sound after all.

Anyway, everyone loves to brag about file sharing, like, "Hey, I just downloaded four thousand songs for free!" And when are you planning to listen to those four thousand songs? Part of the reason I like to pay for my music is so that I only buy an album or two at a time and so I actually have the opportunity to listen to it.

I've probably said this before, but MP3s create too much musical A.D.D. When I have iTunes open and three thousand songs laid out in front of me, if I start out listening to one album and hit a slow spot, it's too easy to just double click and switch songs or albums entirely. Plus everything just becomes text on the screen. When I think about bands that I absolutely love, I can envision most of the album artwork in my head, and I most likely know each and every song title (except maybe in the case of Beulah, whose song titles make no sense). The albums that I remember best are ones that I purchased, unwrapped, examined the booklet, took out of the case, placed in a cd player, and listened to all the way through. In a way it's like how watching Nova makes you learn things a lot more than reading about it in a text book - it's the combination of using all of your senses to appreciate something that makes it more memorable.

I also realized that my last post made me sound like some sort of romantic weirdo who can't listen to anything unless it makes me want to take a knife to my wrists. There are all kinds of music that affect me, not necessarily just the dramatic emotional twee stuff. I think I more meant that not much music grabs me these days simply in a way that would make me sit up and take notice and want to listen to it over and over.

For the most part, everything I hear is pretty ok, but if I heard it in a bar I wouldn't necessarily recognize who it was or know which album it's on. Like Midlake, whose album I downloaded, and it's pretty good to listen to, but if I heard a random song of theirs, I'm almost positive I wouldn't be able to recognize it.

But then I'll hear something like Jens Lekman, who I recently fell in love with, who just feels very recognizable to me, like I'd always know who he was, what album the song is off of, and probably even be able to sing along to pretty well. Or LCD Soundsystem, who I think are awesome and make me want to dance a lot every time I hear them. So it's not all about only listening to music that makes me cry, I just want to listen to a band that I'd actually be able to pick out of a musical line-up.

What the hell am I going on about again? Ok, I'll leave it at that, because I'm sure nobody gives a crap about the music I listen to.

I'm trying to decide whether I want to redesign this thing, or give it up altogether. I guess I'm always trying to decide that. I'm feeling a little sad-sacky lately, like I'd be writing for this thing that no one reads, except the people I already hang out with, who I can just talk to face to face anyway. But on the other hand, I've been getting back into writing lately and maybe I just need an excuse to do some. If I could just stop being so serious with my entries maybe people would actually want to read it. But I've been getting some compliments about the house blog, so I'm feeling a little more empowered to write more, that perhaps maybe for some reason someone somewhere would want to read stuff written by me. Perhaps.